A Month In Review

Here it is! My 30th post this month. I successfully wrote a post every day. It was a lot harder than I thought. Scratch that, I knew it was going to be difficult. I find it much more fun to read and comment on posts than to write one myself. I always have that nagging thought in my head, "Who really wants to know what going on in your life?" Sometimes my posts haven't been all that interesting, but they have all been something from my life at the moment. It's definitely been an interesting month! It's been so exciting to get something I've been waiting for all my life and touching to feel love and encouragement from all of you. Thanks for sharing that with me. I really didn't know what I was getting into when I started this blog. I couldn't have imagined the friendships and support I would not only receive, but have the privilege to witness and give myself. I guess what I am trying to say is thank you for a great month. Can't wait to see what the next one brings!!

Music Soothes the Savage Beast

I had another concert tonight. Poor DW is not feeling well so he stayed at home and my sister and I rode together (she plays too). I was really feeling crappy again today and REALLY didn't want to go to this concert, but since I am one of only two violas, I couldn't abandon them like that. Besides, I decided a long time ago that if I ever got pregnant, I was NOT going to be one of those woman that used her pregnancy as an excuse to not do things. Anyway, I realized while we were on stage that I wasn't feeling sick. I'm not really sure why. Maybe because I was concentrating on something else, or maybe the vibrations make me feel better? So, even though I am half deaf right now, I am feeling better (the pizza DW was nice enough to get for us helped too!)

I wonder how much the baby can feel right now. Can he/she feel the vibrations? Our season lasts until May, so it will definitely hear the music by then. I wonder if that will influence it's love of music? Kind of cool to think about!

Awkward!!

Picked out a tree tonight! It was actually nice because we had some cool weather for the first time so it felt like Christmas.

It's been a bad day as far as morning (ha! I mean all day!) sickness goes. Not complaining, just stating the facts. I do find that chewing a piece of gum seems to help.

The MIL called us on the way to the tree place. She asked if we would be attending her church tomorrow because they are going to have a video montage to announce our pregnancy. Does this sound weird to anyone else?? First of all, we don't go to that church! Second, how weird would it be to show up to a church you don't go to to announce your pregnancy to the WHOLE church?? Now grant it, this is a very very small church and 95% of the people who go there are related to DW and they have done this sort of thing for another cousin, but the said cousin actually attends the church!! Third, I have no idea what photos they are going to use and despite what DW says, there may be some bad ones. His family has a tendency of all taking a picture at the same time, so you never know where to look or when to stop smiling, meaning you get a ton of pictures of yourself with frozen face and looking the wrong way. I feel bad for the people that are going to have to watch this thing and don't know us or really give a care! I know the MIL is excited, but please!! Does the weirdness ever end?? On the plus side, got DW to agree with me on this one so no, we will not be attending the MIL's church tomorrow. Score one point for me!!

Flashbacks

I went to a recital today for my two youngest brothers. In the same room, same teacher, same songs when I was a student. My husband and I are on the board of the music school so the teacher made an announcement about our pregnancy (still really weird and uncomfortable to get all this attention). Right there it hit me. I am all grown up! Here I am pregnant sitting next to my husband in the same room I sat in as a teenager wondering when my life was really going to start. Here I am. I'm all grown up. Someday I will sit in this same room listening to my little girl or boy squeak their way through a Mozart concerto and I will think about this flashback and I will smile....because I made it.

Let's Talk

Yesterday was interesting. I usually have lunch with two different ladies at work. I know I really should bring my lunch to work since we have a very nice kitchen and it would save money, but sometimes you just need to leave for an hour. One of the ladies took the day off yesterday, so it was just me and the other lady (I will call her K). K had a tubal pregnancy this year. She is the type of person that just fluffs everything off and won't talk about things, so we never really discussed it. The only reason that I knew about it was since I work in Admin, she reported to me that she wouldn't be in when she had to go in for the D&C and since we were friends, she told me why. Right after, she had to throw a shower for her sister and attend one at work. I really wanted to say something, but I didn't know if I should bring it up. I knew it had to be killing her though. I also knew that they were trying again because she had made a few comments and had to go for an HSG test. When I told her that I was pregnant earlier this week, I quickly mentioned that we had been trying for a while. I could see she was surprised and was hoping we could get a chance to really talk. We drove to Target on our lunch break and it's about 15 minutes from where we work. She mentioned in passing that a friend told her there was something called an ovulation monitor? We'll, this just opened the flood gates! I told her that yes, I was VERY well educated on this monitor. I could also tell her everything she needed to know about OPK's, saliva tests, and even a watch. She was shocked. "You weren't kidding when you said you were trying!!" She finally opened up about her pregnancy, miscarriage and frustration of TTC. It felt good to talk to someone IRL. We even laughed about the mishaps while tryin to BD. I just hope it helped her to be able to talk about it.

'Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

So tired that my eyes are closing while I'm typing this. Ten sweet potatoes later I am ready for bed! Some interesting things happened today. I will try to write about them tomorrow. We have two dinners to attend for Thanksgiving. I am not going to want to look at food ever again after tomorrow!

In Love!!

Here it is! Our baby! Doesn't look like much, but to me it's the best picture I've ever seen!

Oh! The nurse called today and I officially have a due date!

July 17th!

In Awe

There are a few defining moments in our life time. One is hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time and wondering how in the world you finally got here.

I was in the bathroom at work getting ready to leave for the doctor's. I felt like I was either going to pass out or throw up (it wasn't just the pregnancy nausea). This day was either going to go really good or really bad.

Thankfully we didn't have to wait long at all. We were ushered into a room and I was told to go in the bathroom and get undressed. There was the smallest paper sheet you have ever seen! DW said he watched her put a condom on the biggest you-know-what he's ever seen (I've had an internal u/s done before, so I knew what to expect.) When she first started, I couldn't see the TV on the wall because the computer was in the way. She wasn't saying anything and I was freaking out! Finally she started to try to show me something. She moved the computer so I could see and showed me the sac and the beautiful shadow that is our baby. I was so awed. Then she said we were going to try to hear the heartbeat. She clicked on a spot and there it was!! I started crying (so did DW but he said "only a little!")!! I am officially 6wks 2dys pregnant! I will post the picture of the sonogram tomorrow. Thank you everyone for your prayers and kind words!

Everyone Has A Story

I went to the nail salon yesterday with my sister. She wanted to get a pedi. I had already had one this week, but knowing she just wanted company, I went and decided to get a manicure. I don't usually paint my nails. I am way too hard on my hands and if I do paint them, they seem to get chipped in no time. Besides, I have to keep them short because I play viola and the nails get in the way. I, of course, took FOREVER to pick a color (I am very conservative in my dress and don't like loud, bright or attention getting colors or items. Some might call it boring, I like the term classic?) The nail tech was this sweet little lady with the cutest little voice. She could speak English pretty well. I don't remember for the life of me how the conversation started (I didn't bring it up, I promise!) but she just started pouring out her life story to me. She was from Korea. He mother was Korean and her father was a black American soldier. Her father left after the war and her mother abandoned her when she was two. The Koreans hated her because she was half American and she said she was treated badly. She came to America when she was only 17. She talked about working hard and saving up to buy her first car. She then smiled and told me that two years ago she finally saved enough to buy her own house all by herself. My heart just broke for her when she told me that she was trying to get pregnant for years and just had a miscarriage a few months ago. She said she "just wasn't good at it". I wanted to just hug her! It's so unfair sometimes how one person can get dealt such a difficult hand in life. I told her I was so impressed by her drive to make a better life for herself. I don't know why she choose to share her story with me. I wished I could have comforted her. All I could do was let her know she was not alone in her struggles and that she should be proud of herself. I hope, in some small way, it helped.

ICLW

Hi! I hope you will enjoy your visit to my blog. It's not always the most interesting posts, but they are the thoughts that swirl around my head and the things that happen in my life.

DW (That's my husband. It's short for Daddy-In-Waiting) and I have been TTC for 14 months. We used OT's, OPK's and saliva test to chart ovulation and never got a positive. After 12 months and no AF for 49 days, I broke down and made an appointment with an OB/GYN in the area that specialized in infertility. Dr. D said that I was not ovulating and ordered two different blood tests to check hormone levels and an HSG test. You can read all about it here. Unfortunately all these test have to happen on certain days of your cycle, and guess what?? AF was being rude again and not RSVPing to the party! In the mean time, DW did his test and got great numbers. This was great news, but also solidified the fact that this was all my fault! 52 days later, I took an HPT (of course a BFN!) and called Dr. D to see if he could jump start this thing already! He prescribed Provera for the next 7 days. This was supposed to bring on AF. A week after I took the last Provera, I had still not gotten AF. Sunday night, CD 66, I was frustrated, bloated and my boobs were killing me! I decided to take another HPT so that I could call Dr. D in the morning and get him to prescribe something else. I did the test, laid it on the tub and went about getting ready for bed. I grabbed the test, was going to do a quick glance and toss it in the trash. OMG it said "Pregnant"?!?! I ran out to DW (so much for a romantic, cute way to tell him), shoved it in his face and said, "Look at it this!?!" All he kept saying was, "Are you for real? Are You for real?" Three tests later that night and still the same answer. Even today I still feel the same shock and disbelief. After three blood tests, my hormones are rising at a good level and I have an O/S scheduled for Monday to make sure everything is OK and to determine how far along I am since the irregular cycles have made it hard to determine. I feel so blessed that Dr. D is taking this so seriously and ordering all these tests after all the problems we've had. I have fears every day that this will all be taken away, but all we can do is pray this is it.

I look forward to getting to know you! I love this community and all the support my friends here give. They are the best bunch of ladies you will ever meet!

Friday Night Fun

Had an awesome evening with awesome friends. KB & BB came over and played Rock Band with us. So much fun! I made plain pizza and buffalo pizza and it was a hit! DW went to the store and did all the grocery shopping for me and I didn't even ask! (Awww! Isn't he sweet!?) I made an old fashioned apple cake from a recipe I found on Bunny's Warm Oven. It made the house smell sooo good! Like fall! Oh, and BB said the sweetest prayer for us at dinner, asking the Lord to bless us and our baby. I almost cried!

Lovely People Don't Always Say the Loveliest Things

So I feel bad for even posting this one, but I have to get these thoughts out of my head and that's what this blog is for anyway, right?

Yesterday we told our friends BB & KB about the pregnancy. They have been going through a lot and share it all with us, so we feel close enough to them that if anything, God forbid, happened we would share it with them anyway. We were at a softball game that DW & KB were playing in, so BB and I were sitting in the bleachers watching. Of course, she was so excited for us. I had previously told her that we had been trying for a while, so she knew a little about it. She was pretty surprised. I told her about all the blood work and going for the u/s on Monday and the fears I have. Her comment was that if something was wrong and I did miscarry, that's what was supposed to happen and this one was not supposed to be my baby. She said her mom had a miscarriage before her and if she would have had that baby, she would not have been born. Keep in mind, she is one of the sweetest girls I know, and she would never say anything to purposefully hurt me. I just kind of brushed it off and said I was praying very hard that things would be OK. I thought about it later though, and wondered how many times I have said something meant to comfort someone and hurt them instead. I hope I haven't. People mean well, but they just speak without thinking sometimes.

I've got very nauseous last night. They wanted to go to IHOP after the game and I had a spinach and mushroom omelet. It had waaaaay to many onions and I was queasy as soon as we left. I woke up this morning and still felt off. If I even THINK of that omelet my stomach does flips!

Oh, and I now have super sonic smelling powers! I smelled a tar trunk from miles away last night!

Is It Just Me??

Does anyone else have this problem? My "Reading List" doesn't always update right! I have gone to the blogs I follow before and they have a new blog that didn't show up in my list!! So, if it seems that I have been ignoring you lately, I am so sorry! It's not my fault!

Another Stepping Stone

More good news today! My blood test came back and my HCG levels are good. At 4,696 it's increased more than ten times, which Dr. D says is good. The best part is I am going to have an ultrasound on Monday. Pray everything looks OK and is in the right place!

For the One I Love

Dear DW,

Though I know you probably won't read this until tomorrow and your birthday will be over by then, I wanted to write this anyway to let you know how much I love and appreciate you. I hope 30 proves to be one of the best years of your life as we begin this journey as parents. No one deserves this more than you. You were the one that never stopped believing, or at least never wavered in front of me. You are the one who listened to me cry every night and held me until I could stop. You never tired of listening to my fears, you still don't, and never asked me to just stop talking about it. Your never ending patience with me is astounding and proves to me the kind of father you will be. I have no doubt I have picked the right man to be the father of my children.

Happy Birthday My Love.

What Happened to the Day of Rest?

Today was filled with the chores for the week. How can two people create so much laundry? I do love the way the house feels after everything is neat and tidy. In case you can't tell, I'm slightly OCD. I don't really feel good unless everything is clean. I got DW Rock Band for his birthday and gave it to him early (his birthday is really tomorrow) so that he could have some fun with it this weekend. I found out why I don't play drums! :O) It was a lot of fun though!

Another blood test tomorrow. Not as many cramps today and not much back pain. Of course that makes me worry. I'm trying not to think crazy things. I'm not sure how long the back pain is supposed to last. I was on my feet all day and it hurts worse when I'm sitting, so maybe that's the reason. I think I will feel a little better if the numbers are good. I ran out of HPT's so I haven't taken one since Friday. Guess I had to stop sometime!

Persevering

This blogging everyday is tough on days like this!

Pulled off a surprise 30th birthday for DW. I really can't believe we kept it under wraps! Lots of details soon. For now, I need sleep!

Yippee!

Hormone levels are rising normally!! The nurse returned my call this morning. Now on to the next test!

Keep Praying

The Dr. called this morning and told me that the hormone levels for my first test came back high and definately mean I'm PG. He didn't have the results of the second test to compare them yet, but he would call me as soon as he did. The stress!! I told him I haven't slept since Sunday night. He laughed and said this is what parenthood is all about!

I have had terrible back pain today. It's fine when I'm walking around, but guess what? I have to sit down for a living!! I googled it (what did we do before search engines??) and saw that it was normal in early pregancy. The high level of hormones actually cause your vertebra to soften! OK, I can deal with it if it's normal!

I stopped at the grocery store after work and DW called me. The Dr. left a message on my machine at home at 1:00. Of course it was after 5:00 and he wasn't in the office anymore. He said he had results!! Why didn't he call my cell phone like he did this morning? *sigh* I was going to have to wait until tomorrow anyway. Guess it's no sleep for me tonight!

Still In Shock

We got home from dinner with friends on Sunday. I still hadn't gotten a visit from AF. My stomach had been hurting, but I couldn't figure out if it was cramping or just an upset stomach. I had finished the Provera for a week already. Still nothing. I was planning on calling the doctor Monday morning to see what I needed to do next to get things moving. I remembered that I had three PT's in the closet and figured I would just take a test so I could tell them it was negative when I called. I did the test, laid it on the side of the tub and went about my tasks. A few minutes later I turned around to grab the test and was totally shocked! It said "Pregnant"!! What?? How?? I tested the day before I started the Provera and it was negative!?! I grabbed the test and brought it to DW, who was laying across the bed. "Look. At. This." (There goes all the ideas for awesome ways to tell your husband! I knew I wouldn't be able to pull anything off!) All he could say was, "Are you for real??" I just stood there in shock. How did this happen?? Then my mind went immediately to the Provera. What could happen if you conceive while on it? Of course I had to rush right out of the room and google it! I found a few articles that said there are no problems in the early stages. One article even said that they used to give Provera to women who thought they were pregnant. If you didn't bleed, you were pregnant! Phewww! OK, now I feel a little better, but what if it was a mistake? I decided to wait a few hours and try again. Another positive!! Neither of us slept much that night. Our Dr.'s office doesn't open until 8:30, so as soon as 8:30 rolled around I called (I got to push choice 3. The one that says "If your pregnant or think you are pregnant...."!). Voice mail??? I called three times over the course of almost three hours before she FINALLY answered. She told me they couldn't get me in until next week. I calmly explained to her that I would have a nervous breakdown if I couldn't come in before that (I used those words, I promise!). I went over my history with her and told her that I was on Provera and was still a little worried about the side effects. She told me she could squeeze me in on Thursday, but that was the earliest. She had a possible cancellation tomorrow (Tuesday), but she would have to call me back. I thanked her and prayed that at least I could get in Tuesday. About an hour later she called back and said I could have the cancellation!! Thank God! Then on my way to lunch, she called again. The nurse had seen my chart and the note about Provera and wanted to see me right away. Could I come in at 3:30? I was very concerned that she wanted to see me right away, but relieved that I didn't have to wait until Tuesday. When I got there I had to fill out more paper work (I had to give my whole life story last time!). When I asked the receptionist why, she asked me if it was the same issue as last time. Ummmm, kinda, but not really!! When they called me back, the nurse told me I had to give a urine sample for a PG test. I go into the bathroom and there are regular plastic cups and sterile cups. Which do I use?? I went with the sterile cup because I figured it was the safest choice. They brought DW back and took us both to an exam room. Of course I am sitting there stressing. "What if it doesn't test positive again? I knew I should have bought more tests and tried again this morning!" The Dr. finally comes in and makes some small talk and then finally....the test is positive! He looked over my chart and said that because we have no idea when I ovulated, we can't calculate how far along I am. He said I had to get blood drawn while I was there and then again on Wednesday. They will compare the hormone levels and if they were high enough and rising we would be able to confirm it was a viable pregnancy. Oh, and he confirmed the Provera was used as a PG test, so no problems there!

I'm still super scared. I went and got the second blood test this morning, but they won't have the results for me until tomorrow. Ughhh! The stress! I think I will feel a lot better when the results come back. Then we can figure out how far I am!

We are going over to my parents house tonight to tell them. I think I would like to wait until at least after I got the blood work back, but DW is so excited! I have only told you guys and my sister and DW told his brother. I guess it's OK because if, God forbid, anything bad happened, I would tell my family anyway. We are just going to make them promise not to tell anyone. Especially DW's mom! She likes to gossip with the family and there are a lot of cousins on DW's side that I wouldn't want to have to untell!

I just want to say again how much I cherish all of the congratulations from each of you. I was so hesitant to post my good news. I know it hurts every time someone else gets it. I don't ever want to hurt any of you. We all get hurt enough from the others.

P.s. I have taken a PG test every day. I am certifiably crazy!

Thank You!

So tired! I am going to have to get used to this no caffeine thing! I PROMISE I will write all the details tomorrow, but right now I am too tired to get all my thoughts together. I just really need to say how much it's meant to me to have every ones support and congratulations. You guys are the best! Still so scared, but I'm letting myself feel a little more excited.

The Rest of the Story

So, I didn't finish yesterday's story.



I wasn't ready to.



Tonight, I will try.



I didn't get a visit from AF. I got this instead:




I am in shock and still so scared. Happy, but feeling scared is kind of drowning everything else out.

Friend Sunday

I didn't realize how much I missed having friends at church. We've only been going to this one for the last few months, so we haven't really met anyone yet. Today our friends came with us (the ones that have the baby we watched for the weekend a few months ago) and it was so much fun, especially since they liked it! I did decide that I could never leave our baby in the nursery. When they dropped their little one off I felt worse separation anxiety than they did! This is not to critize church nursery. I volunteered in the nursery most of my teen/adult life! We wound up having dinner with them later too, and it was so interesting to hear each of our experiences with different churches growing up. Good company, good food, good weekend! Back to the grind tomorrow. Hope it brings something good!

My Day In Pictures

**Warning! Extremely Boring Post Below!**

Sis and I went running and saw this:

I am sure every person driving by thought we were crazy! We were squatting there watching the little guy make his way across the side walk. :O)

Then we came back and did this:

Actually, we worked/did school and my cat slept next to me. (Isn't he cute!)

So my friends, that was my boring but relaxing Saturday. I will try to have a more interesting post tomorrow. Hopefully one that says I finally got a visit from AF!! Please!!!!

All Grown Up

My little brother turned 12 today. He is the second youngest child in my family and probably the one I have the most memories of as a baby. I was a teenager when he was born, so I helped Mom out a lot with him. I've heard stories of teenagers being mortified by a pregnant mother. This never occurred to me. I was so excited to have a baby in the house! He and I just clicked. He was such a good baby too. Always laughing and smiling. I remember a friend of my aunt jokingly asked me if she could just take him home. I answered her in no uncertain terms, "No! We waited way to long for him!" Two years later, my youngest brother came along. He was the polar opposite. Always crying and fussy. You had to hold him at all times or he would scream. I would get up in the middle of the night to walk around with him so Mom and Dad could get some sleep. I don't know why he was so fussy. Since I was the oldest, Mom relied on me for a lot of help. I never really resented it, but it got exhausting at times. When I met and married DW and people asked us when we were planning to have children, I would laugh and tell them I already raised two boys and was ready for a break! I look back on it now and am so grateful for those experiences. It gave me so much experience on changing diapers, rocking a fussy baby, giving an infant a bath, teething, fevers and so many other things. I know things are different when it's your own child, you worry so much more, but I feel like I will have a handle on things and not worry as much as the normal "first time mom". Wait, who am I kidding!? I will FIND things to worry about!

Random Thoughts of My Day

1.) One of my co-workers brought her 3 month old in today so everyone could meet him. I didn't really want to see him because I knew I would melt, but she walked around the whole building and I was trapped in my office. He was as adorable as I was afraid he would be. She walked into the room and I just wanted to put my arms out and take him. She didn't seem like she wanted anyone to hold him, so I just tried to satisfy my baby urges by touching his little hand. He had the chubbiest cheeks!

2.) Had to get another bottle of prenatal vitamins today. Braced myself for the friendly cashier to ask me, "When are you due?" Thankfully she was distracted by my necklace, so we chatted about birthstones instead. Pheww!!

3.) STILL have not had a visit from Aunt Flo. What happens if Provera doesn't work?? What do they do then? I know it's only been four days, but you know how my mind works! The "What If's" swirl around and around in my head till I'm crazy!

4.) My sister and I made the most amazing Apple Dumplings today!! I follow Bunny's Warm Oven and she has some of the best recipes on her site. Mind you, ours looked nothing like hers, but they were wonderful!

5.) Do you know how annoying it is for a perfectionist like me to realize that your supervisor has sent out notices to customers with grammatical and spelling errors........with your name on them!! *sigh*

In Due Time

Today I was reminded of what a wonderful husband I have.
D.W. and I have been looking for a house for the last 4 or 5 months. It's been so exhausting! The houses are either not what we are looking for, they won't take our offer, or a million other reasons why it's not the right one. We went into this with the illusion that since the market is overflowing with short sales and foreclosures, we should be able to find a place right away. Wrong! Just like everything else in our lives, its been a major struggle.
Friends of ours found out their house has Chinese drywall. The builder is going to completely rip out and replace almost everything on the inside. They've decided that they are going to sell the house after it's done, and asked us if we would interested in making an offer. It's exactly the model we were looking at and it's on a beautiful lot with a man made lake. We are just praying that it works out and the bank excepts our offer. DW was talking to our realtor and sent me an e-mail after. Here is an excerpt of what he said: "I was sitting here thinking. I truly believed that things would work out for the best for us, but I let myself get so frustrated by the process that I didn’t even want to look anymore….and it’s not that I lost faith, but I just started questioning “why” about everything instead of letting things run their course… It makes me think that everything for us isn’t “difficult” like we’ve always said, but maybe it’s God saying 'You think this is good. Just wait to see what I have in store for you.'"
I almost started crying. Most days I don't feel like this, so I needed the reminder.

Keep Suzanne's baby in your prayers. The baby is still having issues and poor Suzanne is emotionally and physically exhausted.

**Update: Oh my goodness! I am so embarrassed! Note to self: Never post a blog when you are falling asleep on the couch! Sorry for all the grammatical errors! **

A Question For You

Good news! Suzanne's baby is getting better! Your prayers worked! She is still not totally out of the woods, but it is definitely looking better.

So I've been thinking about something and wanted to get all of my blogger friends opinion. I read some one's blog a few weeks ago, and she totally blasted all bloggers that choose to blog anonymously. Up until then, I had only witnessed support and comfort for fellow infertiles. I was pretty surprised and kind of hurt. My decision to blog anonymously was not based on a need to hide, but an agreement DW and I had. I first got the idea to start a blog from reading a few on conceiveonline.com. I was inspired by some of the woman there and decided I needed an outlet for my thoughts. When I brought the idea to DW, my original thought was that both of us would post here. DW loved the idea, but he asked that it remain anonymous and that no one IRL would know about it. He is a very private person. He never did post here, but he reads it religiously! What are your feelings on this? If you also decided to remain anonymous, what was your reason? If you share your identity, do you find it insulting that I choose not to? I hope not. I would never want to hurt anyone here. I have never found a place like this where woman are so supportive, loving and encouraging. It's a whole different world here, and I love it! I don't think DW and I could get through all this without the support.

Time to Call It a Night

I've joined NaBloPoMo: National Blog Posting Monthly. You are supposed to post a blog everyday during the month of November. Hopefully I don't get too boring! Click on my link on the left to check it out. It's a neat way to meet fellow bloggers.

So I have to dish again. Another softball game with The Cousin. If she only knew. She never stops complaining during the whole game! It literally hurts me. I admit, I am totally jealous of her and what she has has, and she doesn't appreciate it at all. She does nothing but criticize her husband, complain about how much work her 3 year old little girl is and how hard the pregnancy is on her. I just want to cry! I don't have this reaction around other friends and family with babies. I just wish she knew what she had.

Very long Monday I'm ready for sleep! Hopefully some good news soon. Last night was my last dose of Provera. AF, where are you???

Your Prayers Are Needed!

I'm trying to start a prayer chain for Suzanne. Her precious little girl needs your prayers! She is a fellow infertile that just had twins. Her little girl has developed bacterial meningitis caused by Group B Strep. Please pass it on and leave her a comment to let her know we are all praying for them.